Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Decisions, Decisions.

Dear Reader,
Okay guys, this is a hard one for me. For you to fully understand what all I have been through and the decision I am faced with, I will start from the beginning.

When I was twelve years old, Santa brought me my very first period on Christmas Eve. When I was sixteen, Santa brought me a very painful cyst on my ovary on Christmas Day, resulting in an E.R. visit.

As a little girl, I wanted nothing more than to grow up to be a mommy. I had a great appreciation for women and their round belly pregnancies. I would stuff a pillow up my shirt and stare at myself endlessly in the mirror. My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for almost seven years now, but when you have poly cystic ovary syndrome and endometriosis, things can be very aggravating and devastating.

About two years ago, I had been bleeding for two months straight. It was a painful experience. I went to see my gynecologist, Dr. H. On this visit, he said that I had qualified for a hysterectomy quite some time ago. Of course I was tired of this endless cycle of misery, (no pun intended) we scheduled the surgery that day. My next day at work I was telling a co-worker about my decision and she influenced me not to go through with it. We prayed together. I cancelled my surgery, and after much more praying, my cycles got better and hubby and I started trying again. No luck. Almost four months ago it started again and hasn't stopped.

This time, it has been much more painful and heavy with lots of clotting. I have an appointment with Dr. H. on August 9th and I am scared of what I will hear this time. My husband and I have talked about the fact that I may need to go through with the hysterectomy this time. We talked about everything a few nights ago and he said he was tired of seeing me in pain and that there is always adoption. While I know this, my dream of carrying a child is crushed? The very next morning, I woke up and turned the t.v. on and to my surprise Dr. Oz was on and guess what the topic was? The number one surgery not to have! I watched this show, open-mouthed. It's a sign! Yes, I know that it may still need to happen, but if Dr. H. suggests a hysterectomy again, I WILL visit another doctor for a second opinion.

Well, thats really all I have for now, I will keep y'all posted on my doctor's visit and any outcomes that will be determined. Please pray for me, I need all I can get.

With Love,


  1. First of all, thanks for dropping by my blog. I always enjoy "meeting" new people. Secondly, I'm now here on your blog and reading about you and your story. I am really glad that you did not go through with the surgery, and I hope that you will find a second opinion even outside of the hysterectomy recommendation. Yes, it's scary being in a new set of stirrups, but sometimes seeing a new doctor can give us insight we wouldn't have gained otherwise.

    Sounds like you have a lot going on your life with your new adventures and your family. Know I'm on your side & rooting for you. If you ever need anything, let me know!

  2. You know that Im fully behind your decision not to have one...You and I have talked about this very subject many many times and I know that you made the right decision!

    Love you!